Have you noticed that your nose runs but, your feet smell?
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
How can there be "self-help groups"?
Why do they call them 'apartments' when they are all stuck together?
Why do hot and cool often mean the same thing?
Why do they report power outages on TV?
When you're sending someone styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
Why do they sell a pound cake that only weighs 12 ounces?
Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?
If a man speaks in the woods, and a woman is not there to hear it, is he still wrong?
If airline travel is the safest way to go, why is the airport called a TERMINAL?
Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as 4's?
If you try to fail but you succeed, what did you just do?
Can a hearse driver drive a corpse in the Car Pool lane?
Why is it when we ask for the check in a restaurant they bring us a bill?
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
Why do bullies always ask "what’s your problem" when they're obviously not going to solve it?
If you sneeze and fart at the same time, does a vacuum form in your stomach?
If you had only one hand, would second hand smoking effect you?
Why do people say "The alarm just went off" when really it just came on?
Can you slam a revolving door?
If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense?
If you feed a bee only oranges, would it then make marmalade?
Is there a difference between a wise man and a wiseguy?
If you throw a cat out a car window, does it become kitty litter?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
Is it OK to use the AM radio after noon?
Why are Democrats called Democrats, when nearly all of their positions promote socialism?
An atomic bomb could virtually level a city. Why then, since the
1950's have they taught us in grade school to cover our heads, and sit
under our desks in the event of an air strike?
Does killing time damage eternity?
If "CON" is the opposite of "PRO", what is the opposite of PROGRESS?
If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
If you fail at suicide is that just one more reason to leave this life?
All men make mistakes; married men just discover them sooner.
Why does the word phonetic start with 'ph'?
What's the difference between a novel and a book?
Why does the word monosyllabic have five syllables?
If I build my own coffin would I be buried in my work?
How can a woman pour boiling hot wax on her crotch, thighs and armpits,
rip the hair out by the roots, and still be afraid of a spider?
If Richard Simmons were an insect, would he be a Lady Bug or a fruit fly?
50% of marriages end in divorce. 50% of married people are women. Coincidence?
Do prosthetic limbs cost an arm and a leg?
How old are you before it can be said you died of old age?
What would happen if you found a four-leaf-clover under a ladder?
Why are dandelions considered weeds when daisies are considered flowers?
Isn't it weird that if you rearange the word "teacher" you get "cheater"?
Why do flammable and inflammable mean the same thing?
Why do 'tug'boats push barges?
Aren't you tired of people asking you rhetorical questions
and you don't know if they are rhetorical questions or not?
If there's an exception to every rule, is there an exception
to that rule?
If Dracula has no reflection, how come he always had such
a straight part in his hair?
Since we see little birdies when we get knocked
out, what do little birdies see when they get
knocked out?
Why do they put Canadian bacon on Hawaiian Pizza?
Can't anybody who has a job go in the "employees only"
doors at restaurants? Shouldn’t they be more specific
and say "employees of this place only"?
Why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's
only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra
penny going too ?
Do the air bubbles that are created when you fart in water,
smell when they pop?
If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear
on the Bible?
Are marbles made of marble?
If you can see your breath outide on a cold day, could you see your fart?
If you are 'old and wrinkled' and are in a bathtub how would you know if you have been in there too long?
I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most
people die of natural causes.
When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed
and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of
the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.
The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy
a replacement. Where would we be without Rhetorical Questions?
Omphaloskepsis
List the thoughts which keep you up at night here.
